Today is my lazy day. I am lazy to iron a basket full of clothes, I am lazy to fold a pile of clothing, I am lazy to do that, I am lazy to do this etc... I did everything today reluctantly.

What happen to me? This is unlike me at all! What do I need to boost my energy and spirit? Who can help me to bring myself back? Where is the real "mrsbeki" who is full of enthusiasm in life? Has my self-esteem gone zero? Questions..questions..questions...

Hopefully tomorrow will be a better day....*sigh*...

I went shopping with my cousins last week at Causeway Point. After browsing and looked around, I decided on this....

It's a sling bag and a wallet.

This sling bag comes handy when I go to market or outings. I can put my handphone, wallet, keys and tissue in it. It's not easy to go to market pushing Affandy in a stroller and holds Afiqah's hand. So with this bag, I don't have to carry a handbag anymore. My cousin said this bag is for bus conductor who collect bus fare from passengers. Woikk!!

My cousins also laughed hard at me when they saw I took out my cards bundled in a hair band. Pathetic right??!! Well...I did not have a wallet that time cause the previous one has torn. They advised that it's not good to carry all those cards like that as the magnetic may scratch and thus spoil the cards. So it's high time I got a new wallet. It's not branded or expensive as I don't have the luxury to buy branded goods anymore. Budget beb!! I guess these bags will do so I don't have to bundle my cards in a hair band anymore!!!

DOA SEORANG SAUDARA

(Khas Buat Md Khir Bin Johari)

Ya Allah Ya Tuhan ku,
Engkaulah yang Maha Pengasih lagi Penyayang
Engkaulah yang Maha Agung dan Maha Besar

Ya Allah Ya Tuhan ku,
Terimalah doa dari hambaMu yang hina ini
Kabulkanlah doa insan yang daif ini
Sesungguhnya Engkaulah yang menentukan segalanya

Ya Allah Ya Tuhan ku, aku bermohon kepadaMu
Engkau kuatkanlah iman saudaraku
Engkau tabahkanlah hatinya menghadapi dugaanMu
Engkau kurangkanlah azabMu terhadapnya
Engkau sembuhkanlah penyakit yang dihidapinya
Dan engkau ampunkanlah dosa-dosanya, Ya Allah...

Ya Allah Ya Tuhan ku,
Kasihanilah dirinya yang dalam kesakitan
Kasihanilah isterinya yang dalam kesedihan
Kasihanilah anak-anaknya yang dalam kerinduan
Kasihanilah ibunya yang dalam kepasrahan

Ya Allah Ya Tuhan ku,
Berikanlah dia kesempatan mengecap kebahagiaan
Kembalikanlah dirinya dalam keceriaan
Pulangkanlah dirinya ke pangkuan keluarga yang menanti
Agar dia dapat membelai anak-anak yang dirindui

Ya Allah Ya Tuhan ku,
Engkau murahkanlah rezeki mereka
Lapangkanlah kesempitan mereka
Teguhkanlah ketaqwaan mereka
Semoga iman mereka tetap kukuh dijalanMu

Hanya Engkau yang Maha Mengetahui
Apa hikmah di sebalik cubaan ini
Apa kesudahan di sebalik dugaan ini
Segala apa yang telah Engkau takdirkan,
Segala apa yang telah Engkau catitkan,
Aku berdoa semoga mereka redha....
Curahkanlah kasih sayang Mu pada mereka, Ya Allah...
Limpahkanlah rahmat, taufik dan hidayahMu, Ya Allah
Khususnya untuk.....saudaraku

Hanya Engkau Yang Maha Pemurah, Pengasih lagi Penyayang.....

Amin Ya Rabbal Alamin....

I was in the mood of spring cleaning. Been busy cleaning the house and rearranged the furniture. Look at this....

Where are my dining chairs? I dumped them in the study room to prevent Affandy from climbing on the table. So far, he had fell twice from the table. Benjol kepala dia!!! So before anything serious happen, I put away the chairs.

This was the best part. Me and the kids got free lunch at Swensen's! Yummy! My "weird" but beautiful cousin, Linda , gave us a treat. 3 other cousins, BabyHD , Lia Neng and Ainn also joined us. Not to forget my dear aunt who also tagged along. This was supposed to be a "cousins and the kids" outing, but having a makcik around did not lessen the fun.

It's not easy to gather all of us, as all lead their own life. BabyHD is a busy working mum with a son, Harith Danial, same age as Affandy. Lia Neng is also a working mum with a 4 year old Dani Irfan. I guess she's also busy making another baby *wink to Neng*. Ainn, a very quiet, simple and adorable girl. Last but not least, Linda, whom my kids called "Mummy Indah", busy with her "project" with her dear hubby. I wish you success dear, I sincerely do. And thank you for the wonderful lunch!

A funny incident happened during our lunch. While I was feeding Afiqah, somehow my wedding band slipped off from my finger and rolled off. I was panicked and asked the girls to look out for me. Linda, BabyHD and I searched around our sitting area and all of us stoop under the table searching for my ring. It was an embarrassing moment as everyone around were staring at us, maybe wondering what in the world these girls were looking for! Finally, Linda found it! It was on Afiqah's chair. Phew...thanks girl! I would cry if I lost it. Thinking back, how could it slipped off from my finger? Either I lose weight or the ring has expanded. BabyHD suggested that I put that ring on my centre finger. Kelakar ekkk!!!

They hanged out at my place after that. We had a good laugh and teasing one another. The girls went into one of my rooms and was surprised to see my collection of bajus. Well Linda, before you publish that pic on your blog, I will do it on MY BLOG (ueekkk - stick out tongue)!

These are only half of my bajus, some more in the wardrobe. Ainn said it's like a tailor's room. Wei!!!

I wish to express my heartfelt gratitude to my darling cousin, Linda, for the wonderful lunch and the effort to gather us all. I really, really enjoyed the moment we shared even it's only for while. Only God knows when we can held another gathering as all of us go our own way after marriage. But all of you are always on my mind and in my heart. I remember each of you in my prayers and hope Allah will protect us and our love ones. And may we are blessed with health and may Allah strengthen our faith and lead us to HIS path. I love you girls.....

OK...OK....here I am. Let me recall what happened to me these past few days.

Friday - Oh..oh, I can't remember.

Saturday - A monthly gathering from my group, Cyberibu, was held at my premises. Mummies from various area came to attend this kuliah. This was a very informative and interactive kind of kuliah. Our Ustazah taught us in a very different approach. She would let us contribute our opinions and ideas on the given topic.

Unfortunately, I was very disappointed as I couldn't give my 100% attention. I was constantly interrupted by Afiqah and Affandy. Afiqah spilled water on the table while Affandy was very grouchy on that day. Afrina locked herself in her room and read her books. After they left, I cleaned up the place. The mess was not as bad as last month's gathering cause this time, I closed the girls' room. So the children that came did not go inside.

After maghrib, we went out for dinner at Yishun. Once we reached home, I put the girls and myself to sleep. So tired and sleepy........

I'M BACK!!!

I was PCless for the past few days. I sent my PC for servicing as some malfunction occured. Everytime I switched on the PC, it prompted me to scan the hardisk due to inconsistency problem. Even after scanning, the message still appeared and I was prompted to scan again. Then, when I went into the internet, it will hanged. It was so frustating and I decided to call for help.

I called up this young Malay chap which was recommended by my aunt. He is very professional and experience despite his young age. He explained that my PC got a bad sector on the hardisk and it needed to be changed. He is very patience in explaining and answered every stupid questions by me, professionally. We were satisfied with his job done.

For those out there who need a PC doctor, give me a buzz. I strongly recommended him as his price is reasonable and he has work commitment.

Funny how this PC affect my life. I am not an aggresive user and only switched it on as and when I feel like it. But when its down, I felt so frustated. Something is missing in my life. It's like....life is incomplete without PC. I can't update my blog, read my tagboard, retrieve my emails and worst, no chatting with my friends. It's like I was being cut down from the outside world. This is normal right.....I hope!

Hopefully this time after servicing, this PC won't dissapoint me again. This creature is one thing I can't do without.

This afternoon, I was supposed to meet up with a group of friends. We planned to play netball, just for the sake of fun. I told my girls about it and they were very excited to see me play. It's been a very very long time since I played that sport. The last time I played, I think, when I was in my secondary school. Wow...its been more than a decade. I'm not sure if I have the same strength and stamina to run around the court and throw the ball. Hope I still have the "ball-sense"....

But....a SMS from a friend saying the plan was cancelled. The reason being....no response from the rest of the gang. Now I am bored at home with the kids as we have nowhere to go. Hubby is working today and I doubt that he will come back early. Boring................

There is this little boy, who is very curious and loves to climb at anything within his reach. One day, he found something that is very interesting. He climbed up the table, and try to get in. He banged and shouted at this thing, hope that this thing would let him in....



Maybe not. So he try other means. How about pressing the buttons? Who knows this thing would open up....



Then he realized that a "papparazzi" caught him in act!! He shouted angrily, "Go away! Get busy with something else..or get a life!!"



The moral of the story.....................

Wow! It's been quite sometime I did not update. First of all, I would like to thank my fellow bloggers for their soothing words to make me calm. I even got a blood sista now!! (*wink*) I'm alright actually. I felt fine right after I posted that entry. That's the power of writing. I penned down my thoughts and it felt like the burden of anger slowly fade away.....

Back to the topic why I did not update. Well....it's not that I was that busy. In fact, it's a long weekend for me as Tuesday was a school holiday for Afrina. So I did not have to rush things. We did go out to my mum's house, picnic at East Coast and also hanged out with my hubby's buddy. I have accessed to the PC and I even surfed the net and visited a lot of others bloggers' websites. I have a lot of things on my mind for me to type it down to post an entry. But I just didn't want to. For the past week, I would rather read other people's entry than writing my own. What is the word to describe me??

By the way, at 8.30 pm today, I have known my husband for exactly 11 years!!! We have been married for 7 wonderful years. I remembered the very first time he called to get to know me. He was such a gentleman, and he still is. To my darling hubby...Happy 11th Year "Get To Know You" Anniversary!!!

I hate it when people like to take advantage of me. I may be nice, but that doesn't mean people can take me for granted.

There is a difference between a "request" and "demand". I can always decline a "request", but as a gesture of goodwill, I will gladly do it as a favour. But if people come to me and "demand" me to do something, as though it's my responsibility to fulfill that demand. But what I do not understand about myself, why do I proceed to fulfill that demand? Even though I was unhappy inside, I still do the task reluctantly. Was it because I want to avoid trouble, or I just couldn't be bothered? Was it because I want to prolong the friendship and do not want to this issue to strain the relationship? And to make matter worse, no words of appreciation after what I've done. I really felt bitter and angry inside. I do not expect to be treated like god, but at least a word of thanks would live up my spirit.

For those who do not know the other side of me, I can bite people's head too. Not just that, I can even eat up the brain and suck up the blood. Do not test my patience!! There is always a word called 'limit'. Once my anger reach the 'limit' line, I am not who you think I am. Rest assured that you will regret what you have done to me. By then, no soothing words can compose me. No apology can be accepted. Make no mistake to understand that!!! Arrrggghhhh.....!!!!

But so far, none of the above has happened. It's all in my head. My imagination always run wild if I do not control my mind and emotion. End of the day, I always remind myself to return to the correct path. And I pray that I hope will not do the same to other human beings as what these people did to me.

Today is supposed to be my "off-day" but yet I still "work" like any other days. Hubby is working and since it's raining, I stayed home with the kids. I get my girls to help me tidy up their room, but we messed up the study room instead. This is because we just bought a wardrobe and chest drawers for the kids and their abah do not want to see toys scattered all over their room. So where can we put all those toys? We dumped them in the study room!

Their room looks better now with the new colourful wardrobe. Of course there are still some toys laying around but its not as bad as last time. When it was time for bed, I always had to get them to keep their toys first before they could have their milk. Sometimes it was like I was talking to the wall as they ignored my instruction! Now with the toys being dumped somewhere, no more nagging from me (I hope). But tomorrow got to think of a way to tidy up the study room. Sigh....work never end.....